Summary
The Meaning of Comparing Mahr to Wages, and Marriage to Sale
Comparison of mahr to wages, and nikah to sale, functions as a legal way to separate the spouses in their rights when stubborn dispute occurs.
No meaning of bargaining, pricing, or buying intimacy enters this comparison. Nikah remains a contract of honour and generosity, and validity remains even when mahr is not named at the time of the contract, which would not hold if nikah were truly sale or hiring. (ʿAwdat al Hijab 2/296 to 298)
The Wisdom Behind Mahr, and Honouring Women
Mahr stands among the fine qualities of Sharia, raising the status of women and honouring them. Shah Wali Allah al Dihlawi (d. 1176 AH) tied mahr to clear separation between nikah and zina, and to settling the spouses upon constant cooperation.
Men hold qiwamah, and divorce remains in the husband’s hand, so a visible loss of wealth is placed before him when he considers untying the bond, preventing rash divorce except at unavoidable need.
Seriousness in nikah also becomes clear through wealth, because people are most protective of wealth, and guardians’ hearts become settled when the one taking “the dearest pieces of their hearts” gives a recognised bridal gift. The Qur’an connects chastity to seeking marriage through wealth:
أَن تَبْتَغُوا بِأَمْوَٰلِكُم مُّحْصِنِينَ غَيْرَ مُسَٰفِحِينَ
“That you seek with your wealth, being chaste, not fornicators.” (Surah al Nisa: 24) (Hujjat Allah al Balighah 2/198 to 199)
Al Badr al ʿAyni (d. 855 AH) connected mahr to “showing the honour of the place”, meaning protection of the dignity of nikah from any doubt of direct exchange. (al Binayah Sharh al Hidayah 5/133)
Al Kasani (d. 587 AH) clarified this meaning in precise legal terms: mahr prevents the husband from ending the marriage at the slightest conflict, because dissolution carries financial consequence, and the purposes of nikah are not realised without harmony and mutual agreement.
Agreement occurs when the wife is honoured and respected, and honour increases when access is not made cheap, but attached to wealth that carries weight with the husband. What is hard to obtain becomes precious in the eyes, so keeping it becomes precious, while what is easy to obtain becomes cheap, and cheapness breeds coldness and loneliness, so the aims of nikah fail. (Badaʾi al Sanaʾi 2/275)
Modern Statements on the Purpose of Mahr
Mustafa al Sibaʿi (d. 1384 AH) described mahr as “a symbol of honouring the woman and the desire to marry her”. (al Marʾah Bayna al Fiqh wa al Qanun page 56)
Wahbah al Zuhayli (d. 1436 AH) gathered the aims into one frame: showing the seriousness and status of the contract, strengthening and honouring the woman, giving proof of intending a dignified married life, forming good intention for living with her in kindness and for the continuation of marriage, and enabling her to prepare what she needs of clothing and spending. (al Fiqh al Islami wa Adillatuh 9/6760)
The Dowry Is Not a Condition or Pillar of the Contract
Specifying the mahr is neither a condition nor a pillar of nikah.
It follows as an effect of the contract, so a degree of ignorance about it is overlooked, and uncertainty that will be removed later is overlooked. Nikah without naming mahr remains valid by consensus, though disliked, with mahr then fixed either by later agreement or by mahr al mithl as a binding liability on the husband. Evidence comes from the Qur’an confirming divorce in a marriage where no mahr was appointed:
لَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكُمْ إِنْ طَلَّقْتُمُ النِّسَاءَ مَا لَمْ تَمَسُّوهُنَّ أَوْ تَفْرِضُوا لَهُنَّ فَرِيضَةً
“There is no blame upon you if you divorce women before touching them, or before appointing for them an obligation.” (Surah al Baqarah: 236) (ʿAwdat al Hijab 2/296 to 298)
The report of ʿUqbah ibn ʿAmir confirms nikah without naming mahr, then the husband later gifting his share in Khaybar as mahr, and the Prophetic praise for ease in marriage and ease in mahr. (Abu Dawud 2117, Irwa al Ghalil 6/345)
The ruling of Ibn Masʿud, then the testimony of Maʿqil ibn Sinan about the case of Birwaʿ bint Washiq, established mahr al mithl (the dowry equal to that of similar women), inheritance, and ʿiddah (the waiting period after death or divorce) even when death occurs before consummation and before naming mahr. (Abu Dawud 2114 to 2116, al Tirmidhi 1145, al Nasaʾi 6/121 to 123)
The Dowry Is a Right of the Woman
Mahr is a right belonging to the wife, and the husband is responsible for fulfilling it, while Sharia frees it from the meaning of “price” and from fixing a set amount.
The Jahiliyyah treated mahr as the price of the woman and made it for her father, even calling it “al nafijah”, an increase in wealth for the guardian.
Sharia reversed this and made mahr a pure gift made obligatory for the wife. The Qur’an declares this ownership and the gift meaning clearly:
وَآتُوا النِّسَاءَ صَدُقَاتِهِنَّ نِحْلَةً فَإِنْ طِبْنَ لَكُمْ عَنْ شَيْءٍ مِنْهُ نَفْسًا فَكُلُوهُ هَنِيئًا مَرِيئًا
“And give the women their dowries as a gift. But if they themselves are pleased to give up to you any part of it, then consume it in satisfaction and ease.” (Surah al Nisa: 4) (ʿAwdat al Hijab 2/296 to 298)
Attribution of “their dowries” confirms ownership for the wife, and disposal by the guardian has no share except what she willingly gives after the contract. (Taysir al Karim al Rahman 2/9, Nayl al Awtar 6/258)
Al Qadi Abu Yaʿla (d. 458 AH) clarified the core point on the question of the purpose of the mehr being for the private parts. he says mahr is called a gift because the husband does not own anything in exchange for it. Intimate access after nikah remains within the wife’s ownership.
Even in mistaken intercourse, the mahr belongs to the wife, not to the husband. The husband gains permissibility, not ownership. (Zad al Masir, Tafsir of Surah al Nisa: 4, page 256)
Al Alusi (d. 1270 AH) interpreted “nihla” (a voluntary gift given freely and sincerely). He addressed the claim that mahr is an exchange for intimacy by explaining that enjoyment in marriage is mutual, not one sided, and that the husband carries additional binding obligations such as nafaqah (financial maintenance) and clothing. For this reason, mahr remains a gift and honouring grant, not a price for intimacy. (Ruh al Maʿani 2/408)
The story of Musa عليه السلام with the righteous man, “I wish to marry you to one of these two daughters of mine, on condition that you hire yourself to me for eight years” (Surah al Qasas: 27), does not return mahr to the father. It describes a known dowry, while the dowry remains a right belonging to the wife.
There is a difference between Sharia rulings of earlier nations and this Sharia regarding dowry belonging to guardians. (ʿAwdat al Hijab 2/296 to 298, Subul al Salam 3/193, Ruh al Maʿani 20/69)
The Clear Difference Between Mahr and Prostitution
Mahr stands as an honouring right in nikah, separating nikah from zina, while the wage of prostitution is filthy even if large. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: “The earnings of the cupper are filthy. The mahr of a prostitute is filthy. The price of a dog is filthy.” (Sahih Muslim 1568, Jamiʿ al Tirmidhi 1275)
A call for ease in mahr remains, yet abolishing mahr is rejected, because injustice in using a law is not corrected by abolishing the law.
In some European contexts, the woman gives wealth to the man and prepares the home from her own property. This is lowering her dignity and placing her in the position of seeking the man’s hand, weakening the modesty and reserve regarded as marks of honour. (ʿAwdat al Hijab 2/296 to 298)
Mahr Includes a Right of Allah
Mahr is not a pure personal right. It includes a right of Allah Most High and Sharia, then a right of the wife.
Muhammad Yaʿqub al Dihlawi placed mahr among marital rights that include the right of Allah and the right of the human, while spending is a right purely for the human, and what includes the right of Allah carries the quality of obligation to be performed because it includes the right of Allah Most High. (Ḍamanat Huquq al Marʾah al Zawjiyyah)
The Husband’s Duty to Meet His Wife’s Need
Keeping the wife chaste stands among her strongest rights. When need occurs and ability exists, responding becomes obligatory according to the stronger view among the ulama.
Ibn Taymiyyah said that obligatory intercourse is wajib (required) once every four months according to one view, and according to her need and his ability according to another view. He compared it to providing nafaqah (maintenance) according to her need and his ability, and he considered this second view to be the stronger position. (Majmuʿ al Fatawa 32/271)
Full Article
The Meaning of Comparing Mahr to Wages, and Marriage to Sale
What appears in many books of fiqh, in comparing mahr to wages, and marriage to sale, is only to separate the spouses in their rights. This only becomes clear when there is stubborn arguing and dispute.
It does not, in any near way or far way, mean that marriage is a contract of bargaining and pricing. Rather, it is a contract of honour and generosity. That is why marriage is valid even without naming the mahr at the time of the contract. If it were truly a sale or a hiring, it would not be valid!!
The Wisdom Behind Mahr, and Honouring Women
Whoever looks carefully at the ruling of mahr will find it among the fine qualities of Islam, and among what raises the status of women and honours them. A group of jurists and others spoke about the wisdom behind the obligation of mahr.
Shah Wali Allah al Dihlawi (d. 1176 AH) said: “Among what makes marriage distinct from fornication is settling oneself upon constant cooperation, even though its root is to cut off dispute, in the sight of people.
They would not marry except with a bridal gift, for reasons that pushed them to that, and within it were benefits, including that marriage does not complete its benefit except by each one settling himself upon constant cooperation.
This is realised from the side of the woman by the removal of her affair from her own hand, and it is not permissible that the removal of his affair is also legislated from his own hand, otherwise the door of divorce would be blocked. He would become a captive in her hand, just as she is a captive in his hand.
The root was that men are responsible over women, and it is not permissible that their affair be returned to the judiciary, because returning the case to them brings hardship, and they do not know what he knows of the private details of his own affair. So it became necessary that there be, before his eyes, a loss of wealth if he wants to untie the bond, so that he does not dare to do that except at a need that he cannot avoid. So this was a kind of settling and training.
Also, care and seriousness about marriage does not become clear except with wealth that is given as compensation for intimate access, because people, when they were extremely stingy with wealth, they were not extremely stingy with anything other than it.
So care and seriousness do not complete except by giving it. By this care and seriousness, the guardians’ eyes become settled when he takes possession of the dearest pieces of their hearts. By it, the distinction between marriage and fornication is realised, and it is His saying:
أَن تَبْتَغُوا بِأَمْوَٰلِكُم مُّحْصِنِينَ غَيْرَ مُسَٰفِحِينَ
That you seek with your wealth, being chaste, not fornicators. (al Nisa 24)
So for that reason, the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ kept the obligation of mahr as it was.”
Hujjat Allah al Balighah (2/198–199)
Al Badr al ʿAyni (d. 855 AH) said:
(إظهارا لشرف المحل) ش: أي لأجل إظهار شرف المحل، وخطره صيانة عن شبهة البدل
Kitab al Binayah Sharh al Hidayah (5/133)
This means that mahr is required to make clear the dignity and high status of marriage, and the woman within it.
Modern Statements on the Purpose of Mahr
Professor Mustafa al Sibaʿi (d. 1384 AH) said in “The Woman Between Jurisprudence and Law”:
“Mahr in Islam is a symbol of honouring the woman and the desire to marry her.”
Kitab al Mar’ah Bayna al Fiqh wa al Qanun pg 56
Dr Wahbah al Zuhayli (d. 1436 AH) said:
٣ – وأجمع المسلمون على مشروعية الصداق في النكاح:
Kitab al Fiqh al Islami wa Adillatuh 9/6760
The Dowry Is Not a Condition or Pillar of the Contract
Dr Muhammad Ismail al Muqaddim said: However, mentioning the dowry is neither a condition nor a pillar in the marriage contract.
Rather, it is one of the effects that follow from it. Because of that, a slight degree of ignorance concerning it is overlooked, as is uncertainty that is expected to be removed.
So if the dowry is not named in the contract, the contract is valid by consensus, though disliked, on the basis that a dowry is named for her after the contract, or that she is entitled to the dowry customarily given to women like her as a liability upon the husband. The proof for the validity of the contract is His saying, exalted is He:
﴿ لَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْكُمْ إِنْ طَلَّقْتُمُ النِّسَاءَ مَا لَمْ تَمَسُّوهُنَّ أَوْ تَفْرِضُوا لَهُنَّ فَرِيضَةً ﴾
“There is no blame upon you if you divorce women before touching them, or before appointing for them an obligation.” (Al Baqarah: 236)
So Allah removed blame from the one who divorces in a marriage in which no dowry was named, and divorce only takes place after a valid marriage, so this proves the permissibility of marriage without naming a dowry.
Reports Concerning Marriage Without Naming a Dowry
It is reported from ʿUqbah ibn ʿAmir رضي الله عنه that the Prophet ﷺ said to a man, “Do you agree that I marry you to so and so?”
He said, “Yes.”
And he said to the woman, “Do you agree that I marry you to so and so?”
She said, “Yes.” So he married one of them to the other.
Then the man consummated the marriage with her, but he did not appoint any dowry for her, nor did he give her anything. He was among those who had witnessed al Hudaybiyah, and whoever had witnessed al Hudaybiyah had a share in Khaybar.
So when death came to him, he said, “The Messenger of Allah ﷺ married me to so and so, and I did not appoint any dowry for her, nor did I give her anything, and I call you to witness that I have given her my share in Khaybar as her dowry.”
So she took it, and after his death she sold it for a hundred thousand. He said, and the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “The best marriage is that which is easiest.” And in another wording, “The best dowry is that which is easiest.” (Reported by Abu Dawud, no. 2117, Ibn Hibban, nos. 1257, 1262, 1281, al Hakim, 2/182, and al Bayhaqi, 7/232. Al Hakim graded it authentic according to the conditions of al Bukhari and Muslim, and al Dhahabi agreed with him. Al Albani said, “Rather, it is only according to the condition of Muslim.” End quote.
From Irwa al Ghalil, 6/345. See also al Silsilah al Sahihah, no. 1842. Reported by Abu Dawud, nos. 2114–2116, al Tirmidhi, no. 1145, who said, “Hasan sahih,” and al Nasaʾi, 6/121–123, and all of them reported it in the Book of Marriage, as well as al Hakim, 2/180, who graded it authentic according to the condition of Muslim, and al Dhahabi agreed with him, and al Bayhaqi, 7/245, who said, “Its chain is authentic,” and others.)
And from ʿAlqamah (d. 62 AH), who said, “ʿAbd Allah, meaning Ibn Masʿud رضي الله عنه (d. 32 AH), was asked about a woman whom a man married, then died before consummating the marriage with her, and without appointing any dowry for her.”
He said, “People kept coming to him,” so he said, “I hold that she is entitled to the dowry customarily given to women like her, and she is entitled to inheritance, and she must observe the waiting period.”
Then Maʿqil ibn Sinan al Ashjaʿi رضي الله عنه testified that the Prophet ﷺ had judged concerning Birwaʿ bint Washiq in the same way as he had judged.
The Dowry Is a Right of the Woman
Even though Islam made the dowry, whether in money or in kind, a right belonging to the woman, and made the husband responsible for fulfilling it, it freed it from the element of price and materiality. So it did not set for it any fixed amount at all, nor did it look at it for its own sake.
The Arabs of the Jahiliyyah used to see it as the price of the woman at the time of her marriage, and they used to call it “al nafijah,” meaning increase and abundance, and it belonged to the father, not to the daughter who was being sought in marriage.
Because of that, the Arabs in the Jahiliyyah used to say to a man when a daughter was born to him, “Congratulations to you for the nafijah,” meaning that which increases his wealth, because he would marry her off and take her dowry in camels, then add them to his own camels, thereby increasing them, meaning raising them and making them more numerous. (Lisan al Arab by Ibn Manzur, 6/4492, under the root “nafaj.”)
And the dowry is a pure gift which Allah made obligatory for the woman. It is not in return for anything she must give, except fulfilling the rights of marriage. Likewise, it does not accept waiver, even if the woman is pleased with that, except after the contract. This verse openly declares:
﴿ وَآتُوا النِّسَاءَ صَدُقَاتِهِنَّ نِحْلَةً فَإِنْ طِبْنَ لَكُمْ عَنْ شَيْءٍ مِنْهُ نَفْسًا فَكُلُوهُ هَنِيئًا مَرِيئًا ﴾
“And give the women their dowries as a gift. But if they themselves are pleased to give up to you any part of it, then consume it in satisfaction and ease.” (Al Nisaʾ: 4)
(His saying, “their dowries,” adds “dowries” to them as an addition of ownership, and this shows that the dowry belongs to the woman, and it is not permissible for anyone other than her, whether her father or anyone else, to dispose of it or take it.
The scholar of al Qasim, ʿAbd al Rahman ibn Nasir al Saʿdi رحمه الله (d. 1376 AH), said in explanation of the verse, “It shows that the dowry is to be given to the woman when she is legally accountable, and that she owns it by the contract, because He attributed it to her, and attribution entails ownership, and that her guardian has no share of the dowry except what she willingly gives.” End quote. From Taysir al Karim al Rahman, 2/9. See also Nayl al Awtar, 6/258.)
The Dowry Is for the Wife, Not for Her Father
As for the saying of the righteous man to Musa عليه السلام, “Indeed, I wish to marry you to one of these two daughters of mine, on condition that you hire yourself to me for eight years” (Al Qasas: 27), in it there is a promise and a description of a matter that he had resolved upon, which was marrying one of his two daughters to him in return for a known dowry, namely the wage of eight years of work, on the basis that the dowry would be a right purely belonging to the wife, not to her father.
Because of that, al Zamakhshari رحمه الله (d. 538 AH) said in his explanation of this verse, “It is permissible that he hire him to tend his flock for eight years for a known amount, pay it to him in full, then marry his daughter to him.”
And perhaps this was from the differences in the laws of those before us regarding the obligations of marriage, just as appears in Ruh al Maʿani, 20/69. Because of that, al Sanʿani رحمه الله (d. 1182 AH) said in Subul al Salam, “The dowry in the law of those before us belonged to the guardians.” End quote. 3/193.
Kitab ʿAwdat al Hijab (2/296–298)
Al Qadi Abu Yaʿla (d. 458 AH) said: “It was only called a gift because the husband does not own anything in exchange for it, because intimate access after marriage remains in the ownership of the woman. Do you not see that if she were approached through mistaken intercourse, the mahr would be for her, not for the husband. What the husband deserves is only permissibility, not ownership.”
Zad al Masir fi ʿIlm al Tafsir by Ibn al Jawzi Tafsir of Surah An Nisa: 4 pg 256
Ruh al Maʿani fi Tafsir al Qur’an al ʿAzim wa al Sabʿ al Mathani (2/408)
The conclusion is that mahr is a required right for the woman, which the Sharia required for her, so that it becomes an expression of the man’s desire for her, and a symbol of honouring her and strengthening her.
The fuqaha (jurists) clearly said: “Mahr was required by the Sharia to show the importance of the place.” The noble Sharia required mahr for the wife as a grant of respect that protects her modesty and shyness, and it expresses the husband’s honouring of her and his desire for her.
Yet from another side, it encouraged making it easy and light. It is not from Islam what some, who Europe enslaved them, try to do, in lowering the status of mahr, and going on at length about the harms of being extreme in it, aiming to reach a dangerous goal, which is abolishing mahr.
No. It is not correct logic to treat people’s injustice in using the law by abolishing the law, because by that, no law would remain in the universe. Rather, it would be like the one whose eye hurt him, so he went and removed it so that it does not hurt him after that.
This harmful way led Europeans to the woman giving some wealth to the man, and the woman being made responsible to prepare the home from her own wealth, yes, from the wealth of the woman.
This means the woman does not marry except if she has wealth, or she is forced to face the hardship of life and its difficulty to obtain the costs of marriage.
It also means we lower the dignity of the woman, and we force her to go to the man, asking for his hand, and we force her to tear the coverings of modesty and shyness, which are the beauty of the manners of the woman, and the scale of her nobleness.
The Clear Difference Between Mahr and Prostitution
The article the questioner pointed to mentioned a part of these wisdoms. By that, the huge difference becomes clear between the Sharia of mahr for the Muslim woman at her marriage, and the filthy, cheap wage, even if it is much, that a prostitute contracts upon.
We return and confirm that what the fuqaha mention, that the woman’s mahr, or her spending, upon her husband, falls in return for intimate access, they only mean by that distinguishing rights and separating in disputes when they happen. They do not mean by that pricing, and pure exchange.
Mahr Includes a Right of Allah
Then attention is drawn that mahr is not a pure right of the wife. Rather, it includes a right of Allah Most High and His Sharia, before it is a right of the woman. In this is the clearest statement of the status of mahr in the balance of the Sharia.
The researcher Muhammad Yaʿqub al Dihlawi said in his study “Guarantees of the Wife’s Marital Rights”:
“Among the clear foundations for the obligation of marital rights is that among them are rights that include the right of Allah and the right of the human, such as the obligation of mahr, and among them are rights that are purely for the human, such as the right of spending.
As for what includes the right of Allah, then it is clear that it carries the quality of obligation to be performed, because it includes the right of Allah Most High.”
The Husband’s Duty to Meet His Wife’s Need
As for the issue of the husband responding to his wife in bed, the Sharia made it among the rights of the woman upon her husband that he keeps her chaste. If she needs that, and he is able, then it becomes obligatory upon him to respond to her, according to the stronger view among the views of the ulama.
Shaykh al Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (d. 728 AH) said: “It is obligatory upon the man to have intercourse with his wife in a good way, and it is among her strongest rights upon him, greater than feeding her. The obligatory intercourse, it was said: it is obligatory once every four months. It was also said: according to her need and his ability, just as he feeds her according to her need and his ability. This is the sounder of the two views.”
Majmuʿ al Fatawa (32/271)
